A Story of Humanity: Chanukah for Ceasefire

I am not Jewish, but on December 7th I attended Chanukah for Ceasefire, an event hosted by Rabbis4Ceasefire in New York City.

It was an incredibly beautiful and poignant gathering. I learned so much about the Jewish faith and traditions. They had speakers to honor intentions and teachings for each night of Chanukah, all of which spoke to the need for peace, safety and freedom for both Palestinians and Israelis, for Jews and Muslims, for ALL people on this earth.

In addition to the event itself being beautiful, powerful and needed, I was also blessed to meet and connect with incredible humans. And as per all wonderful meetings, it felt divinely guided.

You see, I had a plan…

The Key To Making Your Dreams Come True: Community

Lately I have been feeling quite proud of myself for making my dreams come true. While I am worthy of that pride - because I have worked hard to get clear, commit to myself, ask for help, have faith and grow along the way - it’s also massively important to note that my dreams would not have come to fruition in any way, shape or form without my community.

Our capitalist society loves to uplift the individual while forgetting the collective so I really want to dwell in the space of we for a bit.

When I think about my children’s book (that will be shipped out to folks in November!!), every aspect of the book’s creation involved other magical humans. The idea came from a wonderful client, the characters are a collage of my real life community members, it went through many rounds of edits with friends and a professional editor, I consulted with multiple coaches both for the content of the book and for the marketing of it, my illustrator Louie Chin brought it to life in a way that I never could, it received funding from so many incredible friends and family members, it expanded beyond my immediate community to other communities thanks to so many kind humans, and it’s being printed by other incredible humans! Community at every turn. Yes, I needed to keep advocating for it. Yes, I have been the book’s champion. Yes, I was an integral part of it’s creation. And yet, if it were just me in a vacuum it would not exist.

Last weekend I had another dream come true - a dream of going on a retreat with horses and nature. It was phenomenal. And yet again, it wasn’t just me in a vacuum. It required an orchestra of characters and support to come to fruition. My husband took on the full time care of our daughter, I depended on others to transport me to Canada, the ranch was operated by our hosts as well as volunteers from all over the world, and the retreat would not have been complete without the other attendees and of course the horses!

Community is embedded in every step we take. Where our food comes from, what our homes are built out of, every single opportunity offered. Community is necessary for survival and for success. We need each other…

Motherhood, Self-Care, Community CareKelsey Fox Bennett BoydSeptember 27, 2023dreams, community, gratitude, thank you, children's book, retreatComment

Tips To Show Up Sustainably For Your Art & Activism

Showing up for what we care about can be challenging. Why? Because we have jobs, responsibilities, families, friends, events - LIFE.

It can also be challenging because if we care deeply, then there’s likely some fear, vulnerability and old messaging blocking us from showing up fully: Am I worthy? What if I do it wrong? Who am I to be doing this? What if people don’t like me or what I share?

When you put yourself out there in your art or in your activism you’re essentially saying, “This is what I believe. This is what I stand for.” As a result there will be humans in the world who will not align with you, what you believe and what you stand for. These people may just not care about what you’re sharing or they might actively ridicule you and tear you down. Thus, standing up for what we believe in always comes with some level of vulnerability.

Followup Question: How are you at being vulnerable?

For most of us I think the answer is not so great!

I learned during the Kickstarter Launch for my children’s book, Arya & Everyone Else’s Feelings, that I was way out of practice at being vulnerable. I felt scared every single day. So many old messages came up, so much fear and vulnerability. It was my childhood dream to be an author and help heal the world. Could I actually do it and feel safe? The answer was yes and no: I could do it, but I wouldn’t feel safe every step of the way and that is okay. I could return to the trust, safety and knowing that I am worthy, that my book was worthy, again and again. So that’s what I did.

And, honestly, that experience not only made me feel incredibly empowered because I showed up for my dream and for myself, it also prepared me to show up for what I believe in when it came to Here4TheKids - a movement led by BIPoC women to bring an end to the gun violence in this country…

Setbacks Are Part Of Success

I have some really exciting news:

I wrote a children’s book!

Even more exciting:

It’s already illustrated - by the incredible Louie Chin - and in 3 weeks I am launching a Kickstarter campaign to help me self-publish and share it with the world!

The book is called Arya & Everyone Else’s Feelings and I am ridiculously proud of it. Click here to learn more and get on the VIP List so you can be first in line to preorder your copy!

Bringing this book into being has been a slow and steady process spanning over 4 years!

There have been many setbacks, but I kept finding the next step and taking it - again and again and again.

At times that next step felt arduous and as if it would never fall into place…

Reminders During Challenge

The past month has been a series of sicknesses and canceled plans in our house and there were times when it felt really challenging.

The full abbreviated story: My daughter got a really bad head cold that interrupted all of our sleep, then her head cold turned into an ear infection (very triggering for me because of my early childhood illness and corresponding awful earaches) and had to go on antibiotics, then my husband got sick, then my daughter got sick with Coxackievirus, then I got my period, then I got sick, then I got a call from school that my daughter tripped and bonked her tooth/gum so we took an emergency visit to the dentist for x-rays. (She’s totally okay!) In the middle of that we postponed lots of joyful plans, skipped a lot of school, and in many ways life essentially got put on hold.

In the midst of In the midst of sickness and parenting exhaustion I had all the feels:

Terror, worry, joy, bliss, acceptance, resistance, panic, frustration, disappointment and acceptance again.

Whenever we go through extended periods of challenge it’s easy to start to wonder, Will it ever end?

The following reminders have been incredibly helpful for me, and perhaps they’ll help you, too…

My Heart Breaks Daily

How can you look at the atrocities of the world and deny them?

How can you look at the heartache and turn your back?

Actually, I know how, because I did it, too.

That Oh So Uncomfortable Parenting Moment: What to do when your kid refuses to participate

I have been a teacher for over a decade. I’ve taught Mommy and Me classes and also had parents visit their toddlers and preschoolers while in class with me.

I remember parents on countless occasions feeling concerned that their child wasn’t participating and I remember loving these parents and letting them know that however their child showed up was completely okay with me.

In most cases I’d see the kids more than once and develop awesome and lasting relationships with them. And even if I didn’t, their child was wherever they needed to be on that day, in that moment, feeling an array of emotions while being exposed to something and someone brand new. My goal was to keep the door open, let them know they were safe and invite them to join. From there, it was up to them. It might take 5 minutes or it might take 5 classes before they felt comfortable to participate.

A few weeks ago was the first time I was the parent of a child who chose not to participate.

And even though I knew from a teaching perspective it was totally okay, I, the parent, was NOT okay.

I always had compassion for parents in these moments, but I had no idea how excruciating it could feel until I was standing in their place.

Here’s what happened…

Let Fear be your Guide & Let Go of the “Plan” - My Giving Birth Story

Birth.

We are all born. Yet when I became pregnant I realized I had never attended anyone’s birth. I’d never witnessed it other than what I’d see on television and in movies. Even though it’s the most natural and normal occurrence and we all experience it as we enter the world, it was actually quite mysterious and distant from anything I knew. I’m an excellent student, though, so I set about to learn and acclimate myself - mostly in an attempt to normalize and de-mystify it. I watched videos of people giving birth, I looked at photos, I started following all sorts of doulas and birth centers on social media, I enrolled in an online hypnobirthing class, I set out to hire my own doula (and did - she’s great!) and then I absorbed everything that came my way through all these channels.

I became more and more confident in my ability to birth my baby. Yet, in addition to learning all sorts of pain management and mindfulness techniques to birth naturally, I also learned about all the ways to medically induce birth or intervene if something goes other than expected. As my husband likes to say, have the plan and then have a few backup plans just in case. Because this is the other thing about pregnancy and giving birth: It’s unpredictable…

Welcome to the Blog

HIGHLY SENSITIVE | KIDS | PARENTING

TRAUMA | Self-Care | Community Care

Bringing this book into being has been a slow and steady process spanning over 4 years!

Here’s what happened…

Birth.